Being more grateful and less materialistic

Lately, I have been discussing a move to live with my boyfriend in Florida. It is a big move from Texas to Florida, so our discussion led to how many things we each own and what we will need to get rid of. Most of us have TONS of stuff! Things that have collected over the years that made us happy in the first few moments of owning said thing. But now, I find it ironic how some of these things that once made me happy have become a nuisance.I find myself wanting to get rid of the very things that I once thought would bring my joy.

Do we really need all these things? I mean of course there are the basics, but it is truly not a necessity to own a food chopper, because you can chop it yourself! An electric can opener, no need, just use a manual can opener. All those pillows, really? Ideally there should only be one pillow for each head in the home. And decorative pillows? I mean where are we gonna sit?

The stores are filled with people who are out to spend their money for a quick moment of happiness. The mind shift is here: Does owning any particular thing make you happy? Think to yourself as you grasp this thing, will it truly create happiness? Not really.

There is a belief in today's society that owning a bigger home, or having more clothes and shoes, or owning that coveted baseball collectors card, or owning the high end purse, or having purchased the car with all the bells and whistles will make you happy. Ego is what drives the idea that the more we own, the higher our social status and the more important we are in comparison to others. Also known as materialism.

The quest for more sometimes can land us in a lot of trouble. Sometimes the lust for more can take over our reason and logic. What will really help is by asking ourselves what is really driving our feeling to 'need' the things we want.

Mahatma Gandhi believed in living a life of simplicity and self-sufficiency. Living a simple life can lead to less stress and a healthier life by living a more grateful life. Mainly because we forego thoughts of the never-ending pursuit of the next thing that will make us happy. Being grateful for what we have eases tension by embracing the things we already have, enjoying the taste of the foods we eat and/or by spending more quality time with those we nearest and dearest to us.

Studies have shown that people who are less materialistic and more grateful suffered from less illnesses, are less bothered by aches and pains, have stronger immune systems, have better sleep quality and are even happier in their relationships.

So looking back at those things that I am yearning to get rid of,  I am reminded to be grateful for the things I have and enjoy them with those I care about. But also to think more wisely about my purchases in the future. Because ultimately life is happiest when we are thankful for every thing and experience in this life. It is in shifting the mind to a more simplistic and more grateful way of living is where happiness is found.

Trust equals Love

It is almost guarantee that you, reading this right now, have at some point in time been hurt by someone you cared for or loved. Being hurt by someone close to you is inevitable. But why?
If you've lived long enough, you've learned that life is not easy. (Understatement of the year right?) We learn that bad things happen and most of us are generally good people with good intentions.

Sometimes people ask themselves why bad things happen to them? They become depressed, angry , resentful. Some people will put up walls to prevent being hurt again. Others will cause those who hurt them hurt back. But does that really solve anything? Most times not.

When we trust someone, it is not really a guarantee. It is something we tell ourselves won't happen because we have faith in them. So why not live life with an open mind? Be open to loving and trusting someone even if they have broken your trust. Because if we are asking someone to "earn our trust" we are asking them to guarantee to not make any mistakes , which is quite simply an impossible task.

The mind shift is this: If we go into any relationship with love and compassion; with the understanding that we will be hurt someday by the ones we love and ultimately trust. We can find peace and happiness.

Trusting is a decision that is made for love. BECAUSE we love. For the sake of happiness. Trusting is knowing that there aren't any guarantee's. Trust is about agreeing to work through the hurt when it happens. Because it will happen. If we all love with this perspective, then trusting becomes so much easier. The shift happens when we stop trying to avoid being hurt, to recognizing that we can move through anything that comes our way.

 Building a wall to prevent trust issues does not keep us safe, it keeps us lonely. It causes unnecessary pain to ourselves, and that's just no way to live is it?

Jump in and have faith. Trust that the one you love has good intentions. After all, they fell in love with you! Know that no matter what , you will be okay.

How to stop being the victim

"No one can make me feel inferior without my permission" -Eleanor Roosevelt 

Some create their problems from their minds. They place blame on others. As soon as they wake up in the morning, they begin thinking about who is stressing them out or what is going to cause them problems the rest of the day, although in reality that problem is created within. This is being the victim.  

A victim will place blame on certain people who have made them feel inferior. They talk in this kind of language all day. What they don't realize is that they are causing the stress to themselves. Because as Mrs. Roosevelt said, no one can decide who makes you inferior except for yourself. By shifting ones mind, it creates power. The creative power to control the outcome of your day. 

A victim can also worry about all the things they have to get done for the day. The day hasn't even begun and they stress themselves out before accomplishing one single task. Being stressed makes one less effective and multi-tasking allows for less focus to any single task. Instead of being the victim, you must take ownership. By ownership, you can simply write down your tasks and tackle them one by one, without stressing yourself out or blaming anyone else. Because ultimately it is up to yourself only to finish any given task. 

Instead of having a victim mindset, adopt and embrace the ownership mindset. One must take ownership of themselves and their life! When someone's says "Have a great day!", think of that as motivation and inspiration for the day. Because a victim will immediately think of the stressors in their life, and immediately attached are the names and faces of those stressors. An owner will detach those faces and those stressors from their mindset. An owner takes control. Because ultimately we are in the drivers seat and in control of how the movie will play out. Not anyone else.

There is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of weather

There are things in this world that I don't like, just as anyone else. But I'm learning that when I SAY I don't like something, for example snow, I'll ask myself if I really don't like it. Is it truly because it's cold and being cold makes me shiver too much and I don't like shivering? Although that may sound like good reason to not like snow, it is only ONE reason. 

NOW, when I think of the reasons I do like snow, I can actually think of more than one! Snow ☃ usually means a snow day. A free day to play outside with my kiddo and build a snowman☃ and snow angels ❄️together that create memories for a lifetime. I like the way snow makes everything appear brighter....as if God painted everything white. When it snows during Christmas 🎅🏼 time, I can smell it in the air; cold and crisp and it smells divine. I have a reason to wear my favorite jackets, scarves and boots! 👢👢 And without snow, there would be no definitive seasons. 

What I've learned is not a fact that I don't like something. It's what I've TOLD MYSELF I don't like and believed it. Once I believed it, it stuck. And what stuck is what I told people. 

The most wonderful thing about being human is that we are ever evolving. Always changing before our own eyes. If we stop for a moment and take a step back to reassess our own beliefs, we create what is called a paradigm shift.  And a shift in our minds is what helps us become truly who we were meant to be! 

Your self concept is your destiny!

If anyone can picture themselves doing a thing, then they are way more likely to accomplish said thing! Sounds easy enough, right?



No successful CEO or Olympic gold medalist or even a teacher has ever been able to accomplish what they've accomplished without picturing in their minds doing the things they do to achieve the results they are after.

A person's self esteem is immediately picked up by others. And no one is born with the title CEO or Oympic gold medalist or a teacher, they must all practice what they do in order to become better. And in order to become better, they must enlarge the vision they have of themselves to either increase their skillset or be more successful!

It does not matter what task is ahead, one has to picture themselves at the end result in order to get there. Anyone can literally change internally, who they are,  within their minds! The mind is a powerful tool if only more people would use it to it's creative advantage!

Dare to choose!

Have you ever watched a soap opera, and the the camera focuses on a person too long? It's almost uncomfortable if it were to happen in real life! As the dramatic music plays, you know something has gone awry and this person is in the midst of making a life changing decision. You almost hope for the commercial to start playing because of the awkward stare of their piercing eyes.

These days, you come across people often that are in the midst of deciding something. "I'm trying to decide whether to take this job." Or "I'm trying to decide whether I should have hamburgers or Italian for dinner." Or "I am trying to decide whether or not to leave my husband."

These people are STUCK. You can see there body language, and it is like they are all crumpled up in the fetal position. They're not flowing anymore. Just as the train has stopped at a fork in the tracks, the movement is no longer there. It is STUCK. And Life isn't mean to be paused. It must continue to move forward; constantly in motion. 

When a decision must be made, it doesn't get made when everything stops. These decisions are made when in motion. Because as you see, the train has SEEN the fork in the tracks. There are always SIGNS that point you towards the direction you are supposed to go. It is simply a matter of using those signs to make your decision and then acting upon your choice before there is even a choice to be made.

A choice is just made. It's done! Then you allow the universe to make that choice work for you. It's almost as if there was no time for a choice that the choice you make works itself out. Being in action opens the mind for a shift. It allows your intuition decide things for you. You begin to learn to trust yourself and stop wasting time and energy on decisions all day.

How to learn to enjoy eating healthy!

A client ( we will call him John) and I were speaking to today, which inspired this post. He told me that I was very strict on my diet. To me, I don't see it as strict. In fact, I know I could be more strict to achieve even better results. The point is that he and I have different perspectives on FOOD.

John told me that his lack of will power was the reason he wasn't able to lose the thirty pounds he's been trying to diligently to achieve. But my thoughts are this: Does he really think he has lack of will power, or is that just what he is telling himself? And in telling himself, isn't he already doomed to fail? 

To which he responded he did not have lack of will power, he just likes to enjoy what he eats. Aha! So another lie he is telling himself. John does not only BELIEVE he has lack of will power, or at least telling others that (an excuse), he is now realizing he WANTS to enjoy food. So the WANT to eat unhealthy but tasty foods OUTWEIGHS his want to lose the thirty pounds! 

Do you see how he has not reached his goal?

The mind shift is here.  Instead of believing he doesn't have the will power, what he will need to do is simply tell himself that he BELIEVES he can eat healthy and clean. Sounds easy enough, right? Not for everyone, but it CAN be done. And EVERYONE has the power to switch their mindset. EVERYONE including you! What he will need to focus on is the RESULT. He has to be able to SEE himself thin. If his goal of losing thirty pounds is truly what he WANTS, then he must put forth the effort to reach that WANT. 

Just like everyone, John has at least three opportunities every single day to achieve his goal. He must re-train his brain to SEE food in a different light, so to speak. Just as I have re-trained my brain. Food for me is meant to nourish my body, mind and soul. It FEEDS me the essential nutrients to keep my body at peak fitness level, to keep  my body fat down and feed my muscles. He may not have these same goals, but the RESULT will be the same. Because I have seen the rewards of eating healthy, I can no longer go back to that old way of thinking. (Other than cheat meal days of course!)

You have the power to shift your way of thinking! I know you can do it! And so can John :)

Enjoy the future TODAY!

Most of us today are planning and setting goals. Goals for the future and imagining what emotion it will bring for us. "We will be complete once we have our second home on the beach." or "My family will be happy once we have the boat for the summer." or "Things will be better once I purchase my dream car." While goals are a great way to plan ahead, some of us stay stuck there. Stuck in the emotions that the FUTURE will bring.

While having goals and being prepared is a great tool to structure your life and plan for what you want, the problem is that we are not living for TODAY.

Take for example a long road trip. You have your plan in front of you, your road map. It guides you, it leads you, because you seek comfort in knowing you have the address to your destination in your hands. It's tangible so it gives you security in knowing you WILL get there! However some people get stuck on the map; their eyes glued to it as if they will lose control of the possibility of not reaching their destination if they let go. They get worried that they might miss a turn or even worse, get into an accident! The present moment is filled with anxiety and so they fail to enjoy the now. 

"Make each day your masterpiece." -John Wooden

The future is created in the present moment. Your happiness starts with what you are doing and living today! Because today is part of the puzzle that IS your future, let's put down the map for a moment and take a look outside the car. Enjoy the view of the journey, enjoy the music from the radio, and enjoy whats happening RIGHT NOW :) 

Make today be the day! It all happens today! Our future is today! Get unstuck with your happiness being created in the future, because your happiness starts TODAY.

Your feelings are not caused by anything around you.

I'll be the first to tell you that I can get quite angry. For the most part, I don't let one bad event choose my attitude the rest of the day. But when one thing doesn't go my way, I tend to let that single event dictate my current emotion.

But then it dawned on me. When my boyfriend pointed out that what I was saying wasn't actually ME talking, it was my emotion spilling out of my mouth. I was reacting from how a specific event made me FEEL.

Take for example a snake. A person could see a snake in the yard and have feelings of joy! This person loves all animals, from all walks of life, so when he sees the snake he gets near it and feels HAPPY and EXCITED even. Then another person, who has read about snake bites and has seen Youtube videos of how snakes have even eaten people alive, runs in the opposite direction when they see the snake.

The snake does not CAUSE these feelings of happiness, excitement or fear. The snake is not fear. The snake cannot BE fear. It is just a snake. But the two persons mentioned above have attached a feeling to the snake.

So in essence, events cannot cause feelings. They don't have that power! Nothing in the environment does. It is ultimately what we believe that causes our feelings. If we believe the snake will bite us, then we are more likely to manifest that action through our beliefs. Now I am not saying we can believe it to happen, but it is more likely.

Your feelings are not caused by anything around you. EVER, They are caused by your own thoughts. ALWAYS. Every single person in our world has the FREEDOM to attach any thought , or not attach any thought, to something. You have the power to shift your mind.

There's not point in having a BAD ATTITUDE

Each day I would come into work with a disgusting feeling. It just radiated all over my body.
"Working in Corporate America sucks!!" I would say to myself. It didn't help that others would have this same mindset. Because I didn't know any better, I adopted that mindset.

What I didn't realize is that this way of thinking was detrimental to my success at my job! Not only that, it poured out into the rest of my life. Here I was, Miss Positivity, posting happy and uplifting memes on Facebook, with a crappy attitude at work. How contradicting was that??

I came across a motivational video on Youtube one day, filmed by Zig Ziglar. He interviewed a woman, with the same horrible attitude about her job I had. (Of course I didn't realize my attitude was horrible at the time). As he began asking her a series of questions, I noticed her body language. I was DISGUSTED. I thought to myself "Is that really how I am viewed by people? Do I radiate that same dirty aura around myself as her?" 

Around the same time, I was in a work training class. And the trainer stopped and reminded everyone in the room, that it didn't matter what they learned today in the class. To stop and think about WHY YOU ARE HERE. He said, don't forget that we are working our butt's off so that we can provide for our families. THAT'S IT!! If you come into work everyday, focused on doing your best so that you can provide your family, then you've achieved your purpose in this building. He spoke the truth.

These two events powered the shift in my mind to create a better attitude for my LIFE. Once I realized that my job was there to provide for my family, my attitude changed almost immediately. I started working harder, making more money, being happier, being more grateful. I noticed the GOOD in my job. It offered me great health insurance benefits, I had friends that I looked forward to talking to everyday, the company provided me great events to attend, and most of all my job gave me a paycheck for being there every day. 

Instead of seeing my job as a life-suck, I looked at my job with gratitude, for all that it provided me. That simple change in my view towards my job changed my entire life. Try it, and I know it will for you too! 

We can free ourselves from the mind

Did you know you have over 50,000 thoughts a day? That's incredible right? What is even more outstanding is the fact that other people want to put thoughts in your head. The news, it wants you to think about all the horrible things happening in the world. The reality is, we already KNOW. But why does most of America CHOOSE to watch the news? Or read about it in the paper? Similar to why people LOVE watching (not so) reality TV.

Our minds feed on worry and misery. Our minds think about the past and the future.  Our minds thrive on conflict and turmoil. Add all that information to what is already going on in our heads from our stress-filled lives.  It's almost like there is a constant storm going on inside our heads. We let outside sources FEED our minds.

The sad truth is, that worry and fear eats at our souls. It's not really what we WANT to be thinking about. It's what the world feeds us. If only we could go back to the days when we were children: no responsibilities, no bills, no relationships, no job, no worry right?

The amazing thing is that we CAN. We absolutely have the ability to MAKE THE DECISION.
I CHOOSE not to watch the news. I also CHOOSE to purchase healthy foods at the store. I CHOOSE to work out every day. We all have the ability to decide what goes in our heads and what stays in our heads. To go to that happy place inside our souls.

You can begin TODAY, by practicing to free your mind. Practice by escaping to a peaceful place in your head. Some use meditation to get there. All it takes is ten minutes a day to have your mind drift to a calm and relaxing place. Or just during your normal daily life, with all the noises and hustle, you can still choose to think of of a place where we just know that everything is going to be okay.

You'll be amazed at how differently you'll start seeing the world. Seek your peace of mind. Calm the storm.

It's a matter of perspective

Someone may think they are right. You may think you are right, even though each individual's perspective may be different, it doesn't necessarily mean either of you are wrong. But how is that possible?

It's like the old question, "Do you see the glass as half empty or half full?". Neither answer is technically wrong. But just for a second, imagine the way the glass looks from the other persons perspective. Do you feel that little click inside your brain? Most people associate that with the little light bulb going off inside their heads. But the term is called a Paradigm Shift. 

Change. Most of us are resistant to it! Why? Because our society is bred to live comfortably. We let our pride blind us from seeing things from a different angle. Let's be real. Change is scary!!

In order to accomplish things, solve problems or attain cerain goals in life, it's absolutely necessary to view things from a different perspective. A complete shift in your thinking.

Move past fear and doubt. It all starts from the inside. And guess what? Everyone has it in themselves to CHANGE THEIR MINDSET. To change they way they perceive the world . Move past the comfort zone and the possibilities will become endless!